Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Dishwasher Commits Suicide

Kenmore Elite “Dishy” Dishwasher died suddenly in the early morning hours of Tuesday, March 11, 2014, at the tender age of 9 years following a long battle with depression and cereal caked onto breakfast bowls. In a tragic end, Dishy stuck his motor relay to the on position and fired smoke through his door. His loving family found him through the haze and stench too late as his motor kept driving even after his door was opened and he fired hot water around the kitchen. After his breaker was tripped and open doors and windows cleared the haze, it was clear that the extensive damage meant Dishy had washed his last load. Foul play is not suspected; Dishy made his own tragic choice. Dishy leaves behind his family who missed him until he was replaced two days later with another dishwasher of the same colour, which apparently is important to at least one member of Dishy’s family. In lieu of flowers, please give generously to the foundation for making dishwashers that fail less spectacularly.

13 comments:

  1. Your dishwasher commiting Hara Kiri should remind everyone to read their home insurance policies on water damage too!

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  2. @Big Cajun Man: With the smoke that filled the house, I was more concerned about a possible fire, but water damage was certainly a possibility as well.

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  3. If your new one is one of these *$*%* low water ones (which seem to be almost all that is available nowadays) you may find you need to switch detergents. We have to use Quantum PowerBall Finish or we get this icky white residue on everything. It took us trying 3 different brands to get one that works. This after using the same detergent for 14 years with no problems, winter and summer. After a bit of looking around online, we figured out the problem is the low amount of water used, not the machine, the need for a rinse agent etc etc.

    Still, it beats doing them all by hand....

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    1. @Bet Crooks: I'll keep that in mind if we have residue problems.

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  4. I think the stove and fridge were in on it....I smell a conspiracy here...

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    1. @John: Makes sense. It's hard to understand why the CSI guys didn't want to come and check for foul play.

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  5. What I like about all this saving and investing stuff is that, when such equipment death happens, I have zero stress to spend money on replacement equipment.

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    1. @Anonymous: That's great takeaway from something like this. It was no fun dealing with this in the wee hours, but I didn't have the added stress of worrying about the cost.

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  6. I can live with a conspiracy. I don't want to live with an epidemic.

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    1. @The Wife: Shhh! The other appliances might hear you.

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  7. Ok, that was funny.

    RIP Dishy. :)

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    1. @Mike: Thanks. I was pretty sure I had something when I heard my wife laughing.

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